START
by dearskye
Summary: ft. Lee Junki of My Girl Haneul, a typical fan girl, gets to meet the celebrity of her life. Only it turns out to be something more...
1. Chapter 1

**START0**

I never thought it could happen. You can say that my life is what people would call a miracle.

Or a dream come true.

**He's everything to me. **

Ironically, that's what every girl says about her significant other, aren't I right? And ironically again, it's what everyone says about my soul mate.

He has girls around the corner, stalking his house crying out his name and giving him marriage proposals. He's moved once due to neighbours complaining about his all-nighter fans and then moved again for _my_ convenience. Truly, if it weren't for him my life in Korea would have been made so much more difficult.

He was a celebrity, stalked and desired by many girls in and out of Korea. I was one of them, the fan girls that wanted him. So that's why I say my life is miracle. It's by health deficiency that I fainted during his fan signing. It's by luck and family upbringing that he was kind enough to wait for me to awaken. It's by luck that he remembered me when he came to -------. And it is definitely destiny that I bumped into him again while I was in Korea.

He's everything to me. And he's everything to the entertainment world out there. And I stand here proudly to say, "My boyfriend is _Lee Junki_."

But I have to say, everything **started** by luck. The only thing that kept us together was fate.

There's always a little light in this jaded world.

That's why I want to share _our_ story.


	2. Chapter 2

**START1 **

I am in Korea!

I shall shoot down these hot fobs with my large eyes, cute nose, skinny waist and long hair. They'll be mesmerized by my beauty and then finally my wish will come true. I'll get married and settled down with a hot Korean guy and we'll have beautiful children that will be recruited by SM Entertainment and trained to become the next BoA or KangTa.

Those are my dreams.

As I stand, utterly confused before the train station map, I know that will not happen. I've counted at least four hot guys who walked straight pass me and they didn't even give me a second glance. Not even the old man gave an offer to help me. So if I can't attract perverted, horny men, how can I get hot fob guys?

I sound pathetic but to be honest I wasn't in Korea to get a boyfriend. I was here to visit an old friend, my ex-boyfriend. What a friend he is. All he told me was 'I live in the center of Seoul,' and 'You can get there by train.' That bloody idiot did **not** tell me that the train map wasn't drawn in a circle (so how can I find the center!) and that they neglected to romanize Korean characters where I lived.

So I was lost.

Something vibrated in my phone, causing me to jump up. Even when I went into a spaz, people took no notice of me. It's different from ------. There no matter what you do people have to stick their nose in your business and make some smart aleck comment on it.

"Hello?" I said. 

It was Dong Young on the other line. "Yah Haneul! Where are you?"

Haneul is my Korean name that he gave me. He said my eyes reflected his emotions like the sky was reflected by the colour of the ocean. I didn't know why he didn't give me a name that meant ocean but when I was with him, I guess logic didn't really matter. I may lie about being pretty but I don't lie about my large eyes.

"I'm lost, Dong Young!" I cried pathetically into the phone. "I swear it's your fault."

"Yah, babo - you're the one who wanted to go to Junki's fan signing. I've saved your spot but you're stuck! Go ask where you are."

That was a dumb statement. I thrashed back in a harsh tone, "You know I don't know Korean."

"Just give the phone to the nicest person you can find."

Females tend to be the nicer of the genders. I walked up to a group of pretty looking girls and smiled. They smiled back and starting chattering in Korean but I didn't understand. I guess they were asking what I wanted so I just handed the phone to the girl closest to me.

She spoke into the phone and said yes a few times. I'm not completely illiterate when it comes to Korean. Before I came I managed to squeeze a few simple phrases into my brain. I smiled at her again when she handed the phone back to me. She grinned, showing all her teeth, and linked arms with me.

I was stunned but as she pulled me towards the ticket machine I began to understand what Dong Young has asked her to do.

I just hoped he didn't promise to give her my spot in the Junki fan signing.

----

Dong Young didn't promise her a spot. He promised to get her Junki's signature for her. I guess that wasn't as bad as I thought. The only problem was if the security guard decided to make some last minute rule like: 'One signature per person.' Then I would have to convince Dong Young that he didn't need the signature as much as I did. Well, that's the truth anyway.

I felt my pulse race as the line began to move forward. The purpose of cramming in Korean was so that I could speak to Junki. I planned my whole mini speech out. It goes along the lines of something like this:

Hi Junki! I'm a very big fan of yours from -------! I know you've never been there before so anytime you come by I can show you around! I'm a very good tour guide. Oh, can I have a picture with you as well?

After he agrees, I would happily grin and get as close to him as I can. After we snap the picture, I would then slip him my number and address. Then the fat security guard would probably shoo us away but at least I got what I wanted to say.

The problem was this all went well in my head.

In reality, as I drew near to Junki, I saw how flawless he really was. I thought celebrities were only perfect in magazine pictures and photographs. But when I came close to this beauty, I couldn't help but start to breathe abnormally. My heart was racing out of its place as I took another step.

His skin was smooth and flawless. His long hair and side swept bangs brushed over his eyes as they squinted happily at each fan that passed by. Junki's feminine lips pursed as a fan gave him a package of homemade cookies. He wrinkled the cute, tall nose of his and winked at the girl fan in front of me.

Then it was my turn.

"Annyeong," he whispered in that husky voice of his.

"Annyeong ha..." I fidgeted with my fingers. Taking a deep breath, I stopped my heart from jumping out of my throat and tried to speak again. "Annyeonghaesayo, Lee Junki - Na..."

I felt my eyes roll to the back of my head. Everything turned black and my heart settled to the pit of my stomach. I felt a pair of arms catch me and I knew Dong Young was frowning as he did so. The last sound I heard was Junki's voice but I didn't know what he was saying. All I knew was that the voice sounded like a song. The kind of song that makes you want to sway and fall asleep to because it will give you the most beautiful dreams that ever touched this earth.


	3. Chapter 3

**START2**

I managed to peel my eyes open and squint at the fluorescent light above me. Where am I?

Dong Young's face popped up over mine. As a immediate reaction, I screamed and slapped his face away. It was an annoying habit of mine. Whenever a guy didn't do something I liked, I'd hit him. Hit the arm if I know he's got flab in his abdominal area and the stomach if I know he's got abs. It's just way my mind worked after all, I didn't want my hand sinking into their flesh.

He mumbled in pain as he sat back down. Now I was sitting up, erect in the bed, staring at my surroundings.

Well, rather at my surround_ing_.

I tugged onto Dong Young's shirt.

"Yah, Kim Dong Young," I whispered.

He replied in a whiney voice and in Korean, "What?"

"Is that who I think it is?"

I pointed right in front of me towards a sleeping figure. He was sleeping so soundly in the uncomfortable hospital chair. His head was flung back and I winced as I thought of the neck pain he would have when he wakes up. It dropped to a side with a soft 'clunk' and then he fell into a deeper sleep. 

Dong Young scoffed, "You've been ranting to me about him on MSN for weeks. You travel to Korea not to visit _me_ but to go to his fan signing - "

"I did travel to Korea to met you," I snapped. "His fan signing just so happened to be at the right time."

"More like you timed your trip to his fan signing," he muttered under his breath.

I heard him but decided to ignore it.

Even though, to outsiders, it may sound as if we're joking, we're not. Those words were spoken with deeper meaning but it's all in the past. Long story short: When Dong Young came to ------, he was the hottest guy there. Ten countable girls crushed on him within the year; as for the others, well it's their secret well hidden. I liked him too but he chose another girl. Then he went back to Korea. A year later, just when I thought we'd never see each other again, we began talking and soon I became his girlfriend. We broke up when we realized long distance didn't work.

I crawled to the front of my bed just to get close to Lee Junki. Now that I'm up close (and personal!), I can see that he had makeup on back at the signing. It was now all washed off. So his skin wasn't as perfect as I thought it was. There were a little mishaps, scars and ugly bumps here and there but it was hardly visible at a considerable distance of one foot. Underneath his eyes were obvious and large dark circles. That was probably what the makeup was for.

Nevertheless, Lee Junki looked stunning in my eyes. Not just as a man but as a human being. His face looked carved to perfection because of his shapely lips and tall nose. His eyes were a different story but when someone can cry in eight seconds I say those eyes are damn useful.

I wanted to reach over and poke his face when he suddenly brought his head forward. I jumped back with a silent 'AH' and caused a huge ruckus. The bed creaked in the most awful manner and Lee Junki's head silently raised as he awoke.

He rubbed his hand over his face, trying to get himself to wake up. Squinting his eyes tightly, he shook his head and then looked up.

His mouth opened and a train of Korean came out. Surprise, surprise after listening much to Fly to the Sky and watching girls fall down in dramas, I understand those words.

I didn't need to look at Dong Young for translation. He knew I understood those words anyway. Lee Junki was asking if I was okay. 

"Yes," I said in a mild voice. I was turning all shy again! In my mind I really wanted to be that outgoing, spunky girl that spoke my thoughts but when it boiled down the business I just smiled sweetly and blushed. What were the words I wanted to say to Lee Junki?

Junki blinked again once or twice. I looked at his face and saw the sleepless nights catching up to his eyes. As a celebrity he truly put in his one hundred and ten percent, so he hardly got any sleep. It was showing on his face. Thankfully he was blessed with youthful looks because without that, he'd just be the next old uncle in a drama.

"Dong Young, tell him that he can leave if it he needs to," I whispered.

I didn't exactly want Junki to know that it was impossible for us to communicate but when I really honestly couldn't speak Korean, I guess that's all it really comes down to. Hopefully he would just think I'm shy when I speak and reason in his own mind that I'm asking Dong Young to speak for me.

"He said that it's okay," Dong Young translated. "He can stay because that fan signing was his last event of the week. All he really needs is sleep."  
"He can go home and sleep then! The hospital chair is really uncomfortable."

"He said it's okay. He rather stay to see if you're okay."

"Well then, he can have my bed and I'll sit in the chair. I think I've gotten enough sleep over the past few days."

Dong Young looked at me with strange eyes. Like Lee Junki, Dong Young had single lidded eyes so it was awfully amusing to see him widen his eyes and look at me in surprise. 

"I'm not joking!" I exclaimed. "His neck will hurt if he sleeps there."

He laughed and translated for me. Lee Junki stared straight at me, causing me to turn away and blush. How many fans would kill to be in my position? How many? I heard him say something in a half amused tone. Was he mocking me? 

"He's wide away now and he can't sleep." Dong Young paused and then spoke in a light tone, "He asks why you aren't talking to him directly."

"Tell him I'm shy." 

"And that you don't know Korean right?"

"No!" 

He gave me that look that teachers gave a disobedient student. I reluctantly nodded my head and he went off to translating what we just said. Lee Junki's voice entered my ear in a surprise. I understood words here and there. Words like 'Really?' and 'Korean.' I guess my plan to improve my beginner's Korean in the summer drastically failed.

"He asked if you wanted to learn more Korean," Dong Young said in a bored tone. I could tell he was getting sick of translating. I don't blame him. Once I had to translate an entire movie for a friend because they lacked English subtitles. It wasn't that fun.

I nodded my head ecstatically. 

Dong Young and Lee Junki conversed rapidly in Korean. I saw Lee Junki nod his head and heard him reassure Dong Young of something. His hands helped me understand what was going on but still; in my knowledge of Korean I had no idea what they were talking about.

"So, Junki promised to take you around Korea for your last two days."

"WHAT!"

I turned to see Lee Junki staring at me. I guess I sounded like I didn't want to. And in a way, I didn't. As much as I'm a huge fan of Junki, spending two days with him and only him would be extremely weird. After all, how do we communicate? Also, I wanted to spend a day with Dong Young again. I always wanted to spend time with him…

He raised an eyebrow. "I thought you liked Junki?"

"I do but that's just weird!

"You tell me," Dong Young grinned. "He's the one who offered."

I threw a pillow at him. "You're the one who planted the idea in his head! I bet you made him feel guilty with those small puppy eyes of yours. You always have a way with people." I pouted.

Dong Young laughed, proving my point. So it was true. He had intentionally planted that idea in Junki's head.

"Are you suddenly best friends with him? You call him Junki."

"Only fans like you refer to him as Lee Junki every single moment."

It was true. I never referred to him as plain Junki. I never thought about the way I said his name. Just by the way I said his name in my head, it showed his idol status in my brain. I spoke it as if it were superior to anyone else's. Though I kind of just said it that way because it sounded formal. Well, I don't know – no one explained to me the logics of Korean language.

"So you agree?"

What can I do? This was a one in a lifetime chance.

So I nodded my head, turned to Junki and gave that hundred-watt smile.


	4. Chapter 4

START3 

I was pacing back and forth in my hotel room. Dong Young said that Junki would be here in five minutes. I was nervous, no doubt about it. Who in the world gets to spend two days with their favourite celebrity? Actually, Junki wasn't my favourite – he was _one _of my favourites. I actually fancy celebrities that I understand a lot more.

Now back to pacing, I was doing that an awful lot since this trip started. I paced while Dong Young was running two minutes late. I paced when I was lost in the train stations. For crying out loud, I paced while I was waiting in line for Junki's signature. Which, by the way, I still do not have.

Five minutes were up and there was still no knock on the door. Now that was annoying. I really hated people who were late. Ironically, I'm always late. But you can't really call me a hypocrite. I just have bad memory. So from now on, people tell me the time one hour a head of time and I end up getting there on time! Yeah that's right, I don't leave the house until it's the time to meet up.

I'm either the most special or the strangest human being you've ever met.

Finally there was a knock on the door. I rushed to open it, something I shouldn't have done. As I opened the door, I tripped over my own toe and fell forward.

I fell straight into the arms of Lee Junki. After that talk with Dong Young I still couldn't stop calling him Lee Junki. Well, if we became friends today then I will stop. I will stop calling him Lee Junki in my mind and treat him as a friend.

But as of the moment, with my chin against his chest, his name was the last thing I thought about. Or more like the first thing I thought about. It all depends on the context. If I were to let you to enter my brain, you'd get lost because everything there is like the Cheshire Cat. Sometimes the thought is there, smiling and laughing at you, sometimes it's not.

"괜찮아?"

See those are the words the Fly to the Sky always sings. And the words that hot guys say to the poor unfortunate (or rather fortunate) girl. It meant, 'Are you okay?'

I nodded my head, not daring to speak. If he heard my voice, what would he think of it? I've been teased about my voice many times before. Friends never tell me that it's ear piercing but they do tell me that I have a high voice. Not the cute high voice, just a high voice.

"준비됐어요?"

Yo. That's all I understood. I knew when Koreans added a 'yo' at the end of their sentences it meant that they were speaking to you in a respective form. So Junki was talking to be in a respected way. I don't know whether I should be happy or glad but I just nodded my head.

He smiled and took his hands off of me. I forgot he was touching me. Wait until I tell my friends and people online! I was touched by the hands of Lee Junki and got to spend the day with him. My friends didn't really care if Lee Junki touched me but they would because he was a hotshot in Korea. Being famous really did mean a lot in this world.

Then he gently tugged on to my arms and led me out. I didn't even have my wallet yet! I made some noise like, 'Ah..ah..ah…' and then rushed back into the room. I grabbed my wallet and changed into a more comfortable set of shoes. Then I walked out and smiled shyly at him.

He has this confused look on his face. He muttered some other jumble in Korean that sounded like a repeat of his earlier question. Then he decided to play charades with me. He stood in the hallway and pretended to walk. With a thumb sticking out he threw his hand behind his shoulder.

Oh! That's what he meant.

"Are you ready to go?" I repeated in English.

He laughed. I think he understood what I meant. I remembered what Dong Young told me on the phone. 'Junki isn't completely English-illiterate.' Junki nodded his head and repeated his question, "준비됐어요?"

With a bright and cheery smile I nodded my head and said, "네!" (Yes)

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Junki took my hand and headed down the hallway. His mind probably wasn't on it but my mind was. He was holding my hand! Lee Junki was holding my hand! Yeah, I know. He's probably thinking that he doesn't want me to get lost so he won't have to face an outraged Dong Young. Trust me, I've been through it. It's **no** fun.

We got to the lift and I began to squirm uncomfortably. It was no longer fun holding his hand. I felt uncomfortable because he was a stranger. I told you once and I'm telling you again: I'm a shy girl. I like being boisterous and loud but boil down to business I'm really really timid.

Lee Junki felt my wriggling and turned, He held a serious expression on his face. Was he concerned for me?

"Can we not hold hands?" I asked, making an attempt in English. He only gave me a confused look. I pointed at our hands and smiled pathetically.

His mouth formed an 'o' shape. I think he was trying to reply me in English but somehow he decided against it. He smiled in return and let go of my hand. I immediately searched my fingers out and made a tight fist. Then I relaxed and watched the elevator reach our floor.

I caught Junki's expression from the corner of my eye. He looked confused and dazzled. I sighed as we entered the lift. Thankfully the sound of the bell covered my sigh.

I think today's going to be a long die.

---

"배고파?" he asked.

I loved it when he spoke Korean. I loved it even more when I understood him. I nodded my head as Junki spoke to his driver. The corner took a turn around the next block and stopped. Junki smiled at me and opened the door for me.

I got out and stood there in front of the car. One step out of a secure area and I was already lost. Junki laughed and ushered me towards a restaurant. I wonder what kind of place he was taking me to eat. Then I got a little scared; I didn't know how to order food. I hesitated before stepping into the store.

I almost jumped when Junki placed a hand on my back. He gave a little push towards the door. I took that daring step in. After all, I said I was hungry.

Junki did all the ordering. I trusted him with that. A celebrity always ate good food right? The lady of the store looked at him curiously when he ordered. She even said his name once but Junki quickly denied it. They conversed in Korean for a while and she just smiled and walked away. He even pointed at me several times.

I looked at him with large eyes. I wanted to know what he said. That's the trouble with foreign countries, especially with the ones you're interested in. You always want to know what everyone's saying.

He said in Korean that I didn't understand again. The horrible thing was that he was saying it to me, not the lady of the store. I only understood one word: 여자친구 (yeoja chingu) and that means girlfriend. What was I hoping more for? That he said I was his girlfriend or that I wasn't? My thoughts were quickly lost when the food came.

I reached for my bowl but Junki stopped me. He took one bowl and began mixing in the rice with the soup. Then he added some red sauce and other things. With a grin, he pushed the bowl towards me. Though I was supposed to eat first, I watched Junki fix his own food. It was amusing.

When he finished, I smiled at him. We did an awful lot of smiling together. It's just something we both have to do when you don't understand each other. At least the smiles were phony, well mine weren't. And since Junki offered to take me around, I guess he didn't.

I took a spoonful of the food into my mouth. The spiciness of it seared through my mouth. I began to pant as I breathed in and out. I looked around for a jar of water. When I found it, I drank like no tomorrow. I drank like I was drunk and addicted to alcohol.

Meanwhile, Junki stared. He stared at me and when I finished that jug of water, he laughed. I didn't blame him. I'm pretty sure a girl chugging down a jar of water looked funny. Then a scene from the movie Windstruck popped into my head. I should've just poured the water into my soup! What a dumb-as- I am.

Junki ordered another jar of water and something else. The lady came out with a tray and placed a jar of water, a glass of milk on the table and a large, I mean super large, bowl on the table. Junki took my bowl and his bowl and poured it into the large bowl. Then he took the jar of water and poured it into the bowl. It diluted the spicy soup, adding at least an inch to the water level.

The lady came back and asked something. Junki looked at me and then burst into a smile. It was a cheeky smile. He said yes to her and she took…she took our bowls away! I looked at the bowls with confused expressions. Yes, multiple confused expressions crossed my face.

Junki took the spoon and raised it. "Eat," he said in Konglish.

We were going to share our food. That was so weird. Dong Young never did this for me. Whenever I encountered something spicy, he took it and ate it. With Junki, he wanted to share. Well, if it's still too spicy for me, I guess that's why he ordered the cup of milk.

---

He took me shopping in the high-class streets of Seoul. I went berserk. Before I came to Korea, I was slowly turning into a fob. Long before I began to love Asian culture, I was a whitewashed Asian. Born in California, raised in California and then I moved to ------. It wasn't until last year I took an interest in Asian culture. Then I started to turn in a fob, a fob with good English.

Junki pulled on my shirt and pointed towards a jewellery store. I wasn't that interested in jewellery. The main reason was because I didn't have pierced ears and most necklaces were too flashy for me. Junki kept pushing me towards the store though, so I went in.

He was more of a girl than me when it came to accessories. He went around looking at each piece. Junki skipped over the necklaces and then reached the earrings. I held more interest in necklaces than earrings so I stood over by the side.

I jerked when I felt fingers grazing across my ear lobe. I wanted to scream but when I turned to look, it was just Junki looking at my ear. Famous or not, it was weird.

He began uttering questions in Korean again. This time he provided actions. It's a good thing he's an actor because it would've been a lot harder to understand him. He pointed at his ear, which was pierced and then touched his earring.

"Earring?" I asked. I touched my own ear, which was not pierced. I shook my head and smiled. "I'm scared it might hurt."

Junki waved his hands in front of my face. He grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the lady at the store. He kept pointing to me as he conversed rapidly with her in Korean. The lady gave me a great smile and pointed towards the room. I walked in and she pointed towards a seat.

What I sat down the lady came over with this scary looking needle.

"Oh hell no," I said. I didn't care if they didn't understand me or not. "Like hell you're sticking that thing in me."

Junki kept saying something in Korean but I didn't care what he said. I got up and ran behind him. My hands gripped his arms as he talked to the lady. I hid behind him and rested my head against his back. I yawned and peeked from the side. I felt him shrug and realized that we were awfully close. The warmth of his body left me as I took a step back.

I kind of missed that warm feeling. Just the feeling of a significant other holding you is something that shouldn't be forgotten.

Then my eye caught something. It twinkled and shone brightly at me underneath the bright light. I walked past Junki to see the item. It was an earring in a shape of a cross, extremely simple but awfully nice. I reached out to touch it but quickly took my hand back. It was just a second ago I was scared of getting my ear pierced.

I looked at Junki's pierced ears. It was placed with a stud, quite boring and plain looking. Also, it looked too much like Dong Young's earring.

I pointed at the earring and said, "이건 얼마에요?"

The lady lifted up five fingers. Five thousand won, she signalled. I reached into my wallet and pulled out ten thousand won. She took the earrings and gave them to me, along with my change. I read the English on the back. After being here for so long, reading English was a relief. Even if it was two words: sterling silver.

Suddenly the lady had a change of mind. She kept holding onto my hand and shaking her head. She wanted to earrings back and was offering to give my money back. I looked at her confused. It was true that I didn't have pierced ears but it didn't mean I buy a pair of earrings right?

Junki stepped in to interrupt us. The lady began explaining to him in Korean. He turned to look at me but when he saw how much I wanted to earrings he just smiled. Laughing and smiling, we did that a lot. So much that I thought we'd get sick of it after seeing each other for the first ten minutes. But for some reason Junki liked to smile at me, and I didn't mind smiling at him.

It was just how things got started.

Junki touched the lady's arm in a friendly manner. He spoke in a cheerful voice, "이준기가 이모의 보석류를 여기서 샀다고 예기하면, 이모의 보석방에서 경기가 나아질걸요!"

I had no idea what he said but suddenly the lady smiled and her eyes twinkled. She grabbed a pen and paper and handed it to him. Junki grinned and signed it. Then he beckoned me over and took the earrings from me hand. I pouted, thinking that he was going to give it back. Instead, he held it up and smiled as the lady pulled out a digital camera and snapped a picture of him.

Oh my goodness, he was advertising.

---

"Thank you for today," I said slowly in English.

Junki just smiled and nodded his head. I don't think he understood me word for word but he got the gist of it. Then I remembered something. I reached into my bag and pulled out the earrings I bought. Shyly, I handed them to him and grinned.

He looked at me in surprise.

Junki touched my arm and pulled me closer. He pointed at his ear and then at the earring I gave him. The earrings glistened under the hallway lights as he put them in my hands. He reached for his earring and took it out. After he did the same with the other ear, he took the earrings from my hands and placed them in.

When he finished, he did some super model twirl to show them off. I gave a thumbs up sign and laughed. He grinned in return.

"고마외요," he said gently. So gently it sounded like he was breathing those words out.

It was my turn to look at him. He didn't say the normal 'kamsahamida' thank you. The way he said it was on a personal tone. I don't think he knew what he was doing to me. I was actually glad that I was going to leave Korea in two days. Another day with Lee Junki and I was sure that I would fall for him. And there is no person more dangerous to fall in love with than a celebrity.


	5. Chapter 5

**START4**

The scent of coffee drifted to my nose and like a little mouse, I wrinkled it and slowly crawled out of bed. My eyes were closed as I travelled around my hotel room. The only thing that guided me was the scent of coffee and intuition. Not exactly the safest route but it hurt to open my eyes. I was tired. Very tired.

But Dong Young had arranged my bloody flight to two in the morning. I managed to force my eyes open and take the coffee cup that was handed to me. The creamy sweet aromas of the coffee wafted pass my face as I blew into the cup. I inhaled its scent, just to wake up. I breathed in until I could feel my chest tremble. That was the problem with my lungs at times; I had trouble breathing every now and then. I think it's a genetic disorder.

"I told you I'd wake up with you."

I smiled in the direction of his voice. I couldn't see him but I had a good idea of his position. It was a half-hearted, weak smile. I didn't care if he got up with me or not. He was supposed to send me off in everyway but I didn't expect him to rearrange my flight to five am. That's right, he had my flight moved to the earliest one possible.

I sipped the warm drink, wrapping my hands around it to absorb its warmth. My throat was sticky and gooey from the lack of water and sleep. I could feel my head dropping in small jerks, little signs that threatened me to fall asleep.

Dong Young laughed as he took the cup out of my hands.

"I'm sorry I arranged you such an early flight, but hey – at least I'm suffering with you."

Dreamily, I looked up at his small, oval shaped face. He had such defined bone structure for a Korean. It wasn't that smooth skin, for his was nothing compared to Junki's, but the way his skin layered over his facial bones. It made him look childish but at the same time, protective. He was just someone anyone would run to when they felt sad.

"Psh, yeah right. You can just go home and sleep in your amazingly soft bed while I have to sleep in the oh-so comfortable seats your air flight provides." I rolled my eyes and downed the rest of the coffee.

He lifted his hands to show he was honest. Then with his long, beautiful index finger, gosh I loved his hands, he pointed towards the door. I let my eyes drift to see what he was pointing at. My mouth dropped.

"You're coming with me?"

Dong Young laughed melodiously.

"Of course!"

Of course! My mind mimicked. When was the last time he said those words so cheerfully to me? It wasn't that I didn't remember. I knew very well the last time he spoke those words. The time I tried to find a valid reason to break up with him, the time I tried to cut all ties with him because he was too much for my heart to bear. I wanted him to say no but he just replied as if nothing was wrong. And so…he still is.

Too much for my heart to bear.

"B-but why?" I stuttered. There were some things I knew I didn't want to hear.

Dong Young got up and pulled me up as well. He brought me towards the bathroom door and pushed me in. With a cheeky laugh, he closed the door on me, leaving me to ponder on his words.

'Because I have old friends to visit."

I stripped off my clothes and turned on the water. Settling for mildly warm water, I let my toes dip in to test it. Then I realized something. Grabbing a towel, I quickly wrapped it around me and opened the door. Dong Young was outside, reading a newspaper – a gossip newspaper. His eyes perked up when he saw me in a white towel.

"Wow, that's the closest thing I've ever seen to you in a dress."

He didn't take me to prom. He took someone else. And so I didn't wear a dress for him on that day. You can say that was the beginning of us having doubts about each other. I always doubted him and he always had little faith in me trusting him.

I gave a tight smile and held my towel closer to my body. He was the one who shoved me into the bathroom without letting me get a new change of clothes first. Reaching into my closet, I pulled out a set of clothes and undergarments and then hurried back in. I didn't look back to see if Dong Young was staring. I didn't want to know.

After doing the girl's business in the bathroom, I came out looking and smelling fresh, clean and fruity. It was the perfume I bought while I was in Korea. Be Delicious by DKNY. I was addicted to that stuff and when I let Junki have a whiff, I knew he liked it as well. Actually, he loved it. I must say, that did give some push in judgement whether I should buy it or not.

"Ready to go?" he asked.

I never 'unpacked' my clothing. No matter how long the trip was. I always took out clothes for the next day and neatly put away the old clothes. There's a fear in making a foreign place too much like home. Way too much like home and Korea is not home.

I nodded my head as I zipped up my suitcase. My hand came over the handle as I pulled it out. Out of nowhere, I felt Dong Young's smooth hands slip around mind and take my suitcase from me. Startled, I looked at him but he gave a smile.

Why was my heart fluttering so? What was he trying to do to me?

I never got over him.

But his smile was so affectionate, so addicting that I had to smile back. It wasn't the same type of smile I gave Junki.

My mind started to stay on Junki as Dong Young chattered away about meeting old friends. My left hand caressed my right as I realized how I liked holding Junki's hand. Even though we hardly knew each other, my hands never got sweaty and I was least conscious of how our hands fit. It was just nerve wracking to hold hands with a celebrity.

The elevator door opened and lo' behold, think of the devil. There was Junki looking distressed, un-groomed but so fashionable. He was breathing hard as he looked up. His eyes were shocked as he saw Dong Young holding my suitcase. There was a confused look in his eyes.

"Where are you taking her?"

Dong Young shrugged him off as he walked into the elevator. Junki didn't walk out but he demanded an answer. I didn't know what was going on between these two but it didn't look good. It certainly wasn't good either because Junki was nowhere near Dong Young in size. Older by six years he may be but Dong Young towered over him at six foot three.

"It's none of your business," Dong Young replied as he closed the elevator door.

I watched helplessly as these two stared each other down. Then I couldn't help but notice that Junki was wearing the earrings I gave him. The dangled lovingly from his ears and he kept looking back and forth between Dong Young and I. I felt the tension and angry between them and didn't understand. What went wrong?

"You're too old for her."

"Seven years is nothing."

I understood the word seven. Seven? The only thing that registered in my mind was the singer and if in context between Junki and I, it was our age difference. I was seventeen this year and he was twenty-four. There was no other difference because our birthdays were exact. We were both born on April 17th.

"You'll never make her happy, leave her alone."

I don't know why but those words followed into my head along with the definition. And I was start struck. Lee Junki, the celebrity and dream of every girl, was defensive over me. He wanted me to stay. He wanted to keep me. I wasn't a toy to be thrown around but now I realized why Dong Young had moved my flight.

He didn't want me to be caught up in some love scandal. I looked at his eyes and saw how much he cared for me. Dong Young looked down with a silent, thin smile and then looked back at the numbers moving down. Finally we came to the ground floor. I was the first one out because I wanted to breathe.

Dong Young roughly grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the exit. We left Junki standing there, in the midst of the crowds who were all staring at him, contemplating whether or not he was the real Lee Junki. As Dong Young rushed me, I found myself untangling my fingers from his. He looked at me in surprise as I gave an apologetic smile and ran back. To Junki.

Junki's eyes widened as he saw me running to him. My arms slowly opened as he smiled so gratefully. He laughed as I ran into his open arms. Junki's strange but strong arms wrapped around me and picked me up. He twirled me around before dropping me, gently on the floor. Dong Young never did this to me.

I looked up at him as he stared down at my face. I felt his hands on my cheek as he pushed back my messy strands of hair. I let my eyes close for a moment as I bit my lip. Then I stopped him. It hurt me inside, but I stopped him and smiled gently.

His eyes flicked with hurt but I took his hand and slowly raised it up. There was something that we could never be. But it didn't mean we could be…

I lifted up his hand and took his pinkie. He looked at me curiously as I crossed pinkies with him.

"Friends forever," I said. He looked confused so I laughed and explained in my off Korean. "Chingoo."

For a moment there, his face froze. But as he looked back at Dong Young and my suitcase, he knew reality had to come and slap him in the face. He regretfully let his head nod and agreed with me. But he didn't say the words with me.

Junki pulled out his phone and placed it in my hands. I looked at it but didn't understand what he wanted me to do. Everything on the phone was in Korean, how was I supposed to work it? Junki giggled as he took it out of my hands. Then he pressed several buttons and gave it back to me. With his pinkie and thumb sticking out, he made the telephone sign.

I typed in my number along with the area code. Then I gave it back to him.

Then he pushed me off in the direction that Dong Young was. I wanted to give him a kiss on the cheek, I really did but I got the better of myself. We just spent on day together, Haneul. Lee Junki will forget you as soon as you're gone.

I ran back to Dong Young, who was furious.

"What was that all about?" he growled.

I gave him a cheeky smile. "Wouldn't you like to know."

---

We waited at the airport for our flight to be called. It was now six am because our flight was delayed. Dong Young fell asleep with his head in my lap. I played around with his hair as I watched the TV. They provided subtitles so I wasn't exactly all that lost.

The news was on and so I watched. But I didn't expect that to show – I didn't expect pictures of Junki and I hugging to be cast all over the screen. My face was pixelated for privacy's sake but Junki's cheerful grin was plastered all over the screen.

"LEE JUNKI: LOVE SCANDAL?"

The news reporter began her talk about the 'love' scandal. My ears tuned out to the sound of her voice and my eyes were blurred. I didn't hear a thing that she was saying. Then I shook my head to regain my sense. I looked at the screen and read the subtitles.

"Lee Junki has appeared early in the morning to contradict these beliefs. He says that this girl is just an avid fan and he holds no feelings for her. He will not being seeing her again, so he decided to comply with her feelings and give her a hug."

So that's what it meant…So that's why Dong Young was protecting me. I looked down at my sleeping prince and gave a bittersweet smile.

"Thank you," I whispered as Dong Young turned in his sleep with a gentle smile on his face. I'm glad I've found my wings to fly away before the pain gets worse. I played with Dong Young's hair as affection surged through me. Kim Dong Young, you are my wings.


	6. Chapter 6

START5 

Dong Young ended up staying at my house. He was lucky because my grandma had left for her hometown for the entire summer. My parents welcomed him into the house with gracious arms. I only told them that he used to go to my school and came to ---- as a last minute plan. They were perfectly fine with that. I never told them that we used to date. My father would disapprove.

He kicked his feet up and let them pound against the coffee table. I frowned at the sight of his disgusting toenails. I swear he has toe deficiency. They were always different colours, never the proper flesh colour. Some days when he walked around too much it would be purple or black from the rush of blood. Other times when he didn't walk enough, it would be an orange-yellow from the lack of blood. I tried to sweep his feet off the table but only succeeded in having him pull me next to him.

I fell into the empty spot on the sofa. My hair fell in front of my face, covering my blushing cheeks. Dong Young threw an arm around my shoulder and flipped the switch. A yellow shade filled the room as he turned the TV on. After switching through our cable less channels, he uttered words of boredom.

"Let's do something else," he said. I looked up at Dong Young wondering what he wanted to do.

All of a sudden a phone call startled us. We simultaneously jumped in our seats and stared at each other. Bursting into fits of laughter, I gave him a playful shove and went to get the phone. It kept ringing and ringing until I thought the very sound of it would annoy me. Finally, underneath a load of clothes, I found my cell phone vibrating in a pants pocket.

"Hello?" I answered.

There was no sound on the other end. I frowned as I walked out the room and headed towards Dong Young. He was now inspecting his toenails. I prayed he wouldn't start picking them.

Dong Young looked up and mouthed, "Who is it?"

I shrugged and was about to hang up when I heard some uttering of Korean words on the other line. The phone slipped from my hands and crashed to the floor. It was a sliding phone so as soon as it collided with the ground, it slid up, hanging up on whoever was on the other line. I stood in place, not wanting to move. What were the chances of that phone call being…

It rang again. This time the ring tone sang hell songs to my ears. I slowly bent down to pick the phone up. Then I threw it at Dong Young. His eyes widened as he caught it. Almost dropping it on the ground, he scooped it from his hands and answered it.

"Hello?" he whispered clearly in English.

There was a cackle of laughter on the other end.

"Who is this?" Dong Young asked. He was starting to frown as the voice just repeatedly laughed. The sound rang in my ears and then triggered a memory.

I rushed to Dong Young and grabbed the phone from his hands. "Oh my gosh," I muttered as the phone nearly slipped from my hands. After getting a firm grip, I lifted the phone to my mouth and yelled, "CHRISTOPHER NG! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?" _Do you know how much you scared me? _

"Hey buddy," he breathed. His voice was still heavy from the unnecessary, and excess laughing.

I jumped on top of the coffee table and then jumped to the sofa. Dong Young looked at me in surprise and I mocked his expression. Sticking my tongue out, I plopped myself back down. Christopher Ng, one of the strangest, but best friends I've ever had. He didn't care what people thought and always had strange impulses to play tricks on people. How he got a girlfriend, I have no idea.

"Hey hey, was that a guy's voice on the other end?" he asked in a nosy manner. I rolled my eyes. Reaching forward, I grabbed the TV remote and switched the TV on. I motioned for Dong Young to watch TV as I conversed with my best friend.

"Stop being nosy," I snapped. If he were physically here with me, I would've hit him. "So why aren't you with your girlfriend?"

"Look who told me not to be nosy."

I laughed and blushed, causing Dong Young to look at me. Giving him a cheerful smile, I told him to go back to watching TV. I knew he wouldn't though. Dong Young hated it when I talked to Chris. I think it's a jealousy thing. But to simply put things in perspective, Chris was with me when Dong Young wasn't. That was that.

"Yeah, yeah," I muttered, waving away his accusation. "So why aren't you with her?"

"She's back in the Philippines for a mission trip," he sighed.

"Aw, you miss her already?" I quickly added a comment before he could reply. "No wait, you even miss her while she's still in town. You're lovesick."

"At least I have a love life!"

Even though he couldn't see me, I pretended to hold my heart like I got shot there. As I laughed, I could see Dong Young fumbling with his fingers. Poor guy, I'm ignoring him at the moment.

"Oh, ouch – what would you know about my love life, sir?"

We had this strange relationship. Sometimes he would pester me to do something and I would act like I was serving him under the army. Other times I would be acting like a police officer to him and he would call me ma'am. Then there were times where I called him dad and he called me mom. Don't ask how these things work, when we're together, we're just crazy.

He clicked his tongue, letting me die in anticipation. "Did you sleep with him?"

"WHAT?" I screamed, hurting his ear and Dong Young's as well. "Heck no, hell no. He's just staying over."

I gave Dong Young a wink, letting him know I was talking about him. He pouted as he took his attention away from the television. Chris knew of the relationship we once held. He had advised me against it, but as usual, I didn't listen to him. I never listened to him and he hated that. Dong Young leaned in, trying to eavesdrop in the most obvious way.

"Yeah whatever," Chris laughed. "So how was Korea?"

My heart dropped when he asked that question. Not because Lee Junki denied even being friends with me but because I remembered that I never got his signature! I spent an entire day with Junki, bought him earrings but I never took a picture with him or got his signature. I mentally slapped myself as I muttered a solemn answer, "Not as good as I expected."

"See!" Chris was pretty anti-Korean. "It's not as special as those Korean dramas make it."

"I didn't go to watch Korean dramas!" I protested. I couldn't see him, but in my head I could see Chris shrug. He always shrugged when conversations came to one-sided conclusions. I heard a muffled noise that I demanded for him to make clear.

He almost spluttered after drinking water. In a smart voice he said, "Are the hospitals always full?"

Dong Young and I, both, yelled into the phone. "What!"

We stared at each other giving weird looks as Chris coughed into the phone. I pressed the loudspeaker button so that the both of us could hear his voice. Bringing the phone down to chest level, Chris's voice blared through the speakers.

"Yeah, after all those Korean dramas with people getting cancer and all that I figured that majority of the country must be suffering from simultaneous, epidemic cancer."

He was joking. This was the reason he hated Korean drams. Cancer to him was relabeled as 'Korean disease.' I guess all this is because of the influence his mother put upon him. She stayed up days and days to finish a Korean drama. Just like some men stayed up days after days to watch the World Cup. See, men and women don't differ much in personality – they just have different tastes.

Dong Young and I scoffed as he laughed.

"Hey," I said, getting his attention.

"What?"

"Why'd you speak in Korean the first time you called?"

Dong Young looked at me in surprise. He understood why I was so shocked when I picked up the first call. I heard shuffling come from Chris's end as his voice came through.

"What are you talking about? This is the first time I called."


	7. Chapter 7

**START6**

Needless to say, my mind never let that phone call. Every time the phone rang, I found myself rushing towards it and answering in my flawed Korean. 

"Yeoboseyo?" my voice would crack weakly. Then I would proceed to talk in my native language or in English. My state of mind was pitiful. It was only one day but those moments had such a strong hold on me.

I curled myself into a human cannonball as I watched the TV screen. There was only one way to solve problems like these. Watch tear jerking dramas or movies and cry until my heart's content. Dong Young refused to watch them with me. So I would throw my cell phone at him and tell him to call up old friends. For several short moments, he would pause as if he had something to say but then with a small disappointing shake, he would turn his head and walk out of the house.

Then I would mutter to myself as the lead girl in the movie teared up. "I thought you said you'd be my wings but now that I've fallen you won't pick me back up." I remembered the day clearly like the way the stars shone on a velvet black night. The night my uncle died without letting me see him one more time. 

My uncle loved me more than anything in the world but he lived halfway around the world. He always had a heart disease that he couldn't control. Suddenly, he was sent to the hospital for no apparent reason. Slowly, day-by-day, he grew weaker, so weak to a point that he couldn't breathe on his own. My family planned to fly back to our hometown the very next day but while I was in school, I received a phone call that devastated me.

He died that very morning. As I prayed for him to get well, he left this earth.

I cried so hard that day, so hard that my pastor who was visiting had to reschedule our interview about my baptism. Everyone who walked by me acted as if nothing had happened. Only Dong Young dared to ask what happened. And I spilled it out in three simple words, "My uncle died." And unlike anyone else, Dong Young came up to me and held me in his arms.

"So I'll be your wings from now on. I'll be the one who loves you more than the world."

Funny. A few months later, he chased another girl.

This time, I was, once more, broken down by a simple phone call. The last phone call, I should have never made or answered. This phone call, the one I should have answered, I didn't. But nothing I do can change the fact that it happened.

I guess Lee Junki got some idea in his head that I didn't want to talk to him.

I bit my lip as the lead male character on the TV screen embraced the girl. His forehead rested against the girl's head as his arm wrapped around her shoulder. They sat on the balcony, watching the dark sky. Suddenly, a shower of meteorites came. Neither of them dared to make a wish because of their past. The girl refused to make a wish because the last time she did, the guy died and left her. But as the meteor shower ended, the boy began to slowly disappear. Bit by bit, his body became magical particles that brought him back to heaven.

She should've just made that wish, I thought angrily as the movie ended. I sniffled and blew my nose in the tissue. Aiming it directly at the trashcan in front of me, I threw it in and watched it pop back out. This is the same reason I never played basketball. Anything I throw in just bounces back out.

Suddenly the phone rang, making me jump in my seat. I rushed up to get it. With a timid voice I said, "Hello?" I had long given up answering in Korean.

"Yah Haneul," Dong Young's voice said on the other line. I frowned as I leaned against the counter, waiting for him to continue. "Come out of that gloomy house."

"I'm tired Dong Young. Let me go to sleep."

He coughed, making me pay more attention to him. 

"You've slept for ten hours yesterday. I think you've had enough sleep. Get up and come out with me."

"Didn't you call Emily?" I muttered. Emily was the girl Dong Young had left me for. "Weren't you meeting her today?"

He answered a little quickly. "Emily's in China. Haneul, come out please?" 

"No."

"I'll buy you a new tear jerking movie if you come out."

I paused. That Dong Young always knew what I wanted. The offer was tempting. "What movie?" I asked. 

"I don't know, something with Gang Dong Won in it?"

I almost let out a squeak.

"A Wolf's Temptation?" He didn't need to say anything. I already knew what he was talking about. Throwing the blanket over my shoulder, I switched the phone to mobile and ran into my room. As I talked to Dong Young about where to meet, I changed into more suitable clothing. When I finished, I hung up on him and threw the phone on my bed.

Grabbing my keys and wallet, I rushed out the house to meet Dong Young. I took the bus and then ran to meet Dong Young at the CD store. He was waiting patiently at the front door. His eyes lit up with joy as he saw me running towards him. Those strong cheekbones of his appeared as he grinned brightly. I ran past him and grabbed him by the sleeve, dragging him into the store.

We quickly dug up the DVD of A Wolf's Temptation. Dong Young reluctantly bought the movie. The shopkeeper placed it in a plastic bag in the most agonizing way. Slowly, and carefully he smoothed out the bag and gave it a small fold before handing it over. I grabbed it and rushed out the store.

"Hey, hey, hey," Dong Young said as he ran up next to me and pulled me by the arm. I slowed down to a stop and looked at him with clueless eyes. His eyes flickered all over my face as he looked worried.

"What?" I asked.

"Where are you going?"

"Where else? Home."

"To do what?" 

I laughed as I swung the bag in front of his face. "You silly," I said with so much pretense I thought I was going to be sick. "You're the one who bought it for me."

"No, I bought that because you promised to come out."

Lifting my hands, I pointed to the scene around me. The bustling people that walked past us without giving a notice that we were standing in the middle of the way, the marble floor that was spotted with old bubblegum and the pillars that held up each floor, all that proved that I was out. "What you do mean? I am out. Now I can go back in." 

I turned to leave but Dong Young grabbed my arm. He pulled me in the opposite direction. We walked past the doors that led to the stairwell. Dong Young backed up and pushed me past those doors. I shivered as he pushed me against the wall. His hand slammed the wall right next to my face. I almost felt sorry for him as he trembled to look at my face.

"What's wrong with you Haneul?" he whispered. "Why are you acting like this?"

I held the plastic bag to my chest. For some bizarre reason I thought it was going to protect me. My eyes were wide as Dong Young slowly looked up. Then I could see that I wasn't the only one who was tired. The signs of sleepless nights showed up under his eyes. I gulped as I tried to answer him. My mouth opened and closed but no words came out.

"Is it because of that one phone call? Do you really think it's from Junki?"

I nodded, feeling the rough tiles of the wall against my head. It was scraping my scalp, slowly causing a strange soothing but painful sensation.

"You haven't changed since I left Haneul. When a guy gives you the slightest attention, you devote your whole life to him."

I pressed my lips firmly together as he looked at the floor. His breath was ragged as his shoulders heaved up and down. I frowned at the sight of Dong Young breathing so hard. It wasn't like his usual self.

"But I thought you were smarter than that. I thought you were smarter than that to fall in love with a celebrity. Get it into your head that he won't call back. What would Lee Junki do with a normal girl when he has all of Korea chasing after him?"

His words were beginning to make sense. What would Lee Junki do with me? Especially when I did not know a single word of Korean. The plastic bag dropped, like my defense, to my side. With a single hand, I made Dong Young look at me. In a shaking voice I said, "I don't know. But you're right – I haven't changed."

Dong Young smiled but I didn't smile in return. I looked away but not fast enough. I saw the smile fade into a questioning glance as he tried to get back into my view. My vision did not include him as I stared at the hand that rested against the wall. I began to see it turn red and white from the amount of pressure he was exerting upon it.

"Why are you giving all of yourself to him? Forget about him Haneul!"

For some reason, I felt compelled to yell. Dong Young was yelling. Why couldn't I as well?

"IT TAKES TIME!" I yelled. I found myself yelling in a voice so much louder than Dong Young's. He was taken aback. Now that I was facing him, I saw his hand leave the wall. A small imprint of the tiles was placed into his hand. "Do you think I got over you at lightening speed? I'm the same with every guy I fall in love with. It takes time to forget about them!" 

"Love?" Dong Young whispered. "You love Junki?"

I gasped and covered my mouth. I didn't believe it myself when those words escaped my mouth. Dong Young's hand was trembling as he tried to control his temper. I pressed my lips together and stood up tall. 

"What's it to you if I love him?" I said daringly. "Do you think I watch this movies for fun? No, I'm trying to dry my river of tears before I can get hurt more than ever! Now leave me alone and let me wallow in self pity!"

I pushed past him as he stood dumbly in the stairwell. I stormed off to the swinging doors when I felt his hand wrap around my wrist. Angrily, I flung my hand, trying to get rid of him. But he wouldn't relax his grip.

"Let go of me Kim Dong Young!" I screamed. "Let me go home!"

He grabbed me and pulled me forward. I found myself floating into his embrace but I pushed him away. He had his chance long time ago. It was too late now. Dong Young placed his hands on my shoulders, trying to make sense of my actions.

"I think it's just best if we are friends," I said.

His voice came in a shaking tone, "I just wanted to give you the hug I never gave you when your uncle died."

I broke down, falling to the floor. He had to bring back the past like it was nothing. My knees were bent as I dropped the movie onto the floor. I held my knees and buried my head into my arms. I found myself rocking back and forth as I was reminded of my uncle. I felt the wind from Dong Young's movement as he bent down to be at my level.

"I'm – "

His words were cut off by a phone call from his pocket. I looked up slowly as he reached into his pocket and pulled out the vibrating phone. He frowned at the number as he hesitantly answered it. I watched him as he stood up and began talking rapidly in Korean.

My ears perked up at the mention of my name. All of a sudden, Dong Young began to yell, outraged, in English.

"YOU LISTEN TO ME LEE JUNKI. YOU WILL LEAVE HANEUL ALONE."


	8. Chapter 8

**START7**

Dong Young went back to Korea the next day. I can't say whether it was my silence that chased him out of the house or just his resistance to my sadness had weakened. I was being unreasonable, I know. But I just wanted to hear Junki's voice. I wanted to hear what he had to say, even if I didn't understand.

I began to watch A Wolf's Temptation over and over. For the love of Gang Dong Won and for the fact that it was one-sided love, I couldn't pull myself away from the storyline. But I began to drive myself into anything that was Korean. After a week of no phone calls, I gave up on all hope that Junki would call again. So I decided to take initiative in my life and not let happiness slip away so easily again. I began to learn Korean.

There was this Korean school down that block that offered Korean lessons every Saturday. All the kids joked, calling them Saturday Morning Lessons as if they were something that popped out of Sesame Street. Without a trace of embarrassment, I walked into the school to apply for lessons. I got several strange looks from the local Koreans but when they saw I was sincere, they just helped me along the way.

Connie would be my first Korean friend there. She made sure I pronounced everything right. As I sat through classes with preschoolers, she would wait outside the classroom so we could walk home together. I never told her about my incident with Junki. Connie had no idea that I had ever stepped foot into Korea.

Dong Young didn't ever contact me again. Even if he wanted to, I wouldn't be able to tell. I had quit MSN and adapted the older style of exchanging emails, which I did with Connie's friends from Korea. Phone calls couldn't be made even if they were tried because I switched my phone number, cell and home phone. Even if I did go on MSN, there was no one I could really talk to.

Chris had left to college in Toronto, Canada. When he did go online, he was always busy researching. College life was like an entire different time zone. He began some strange, and slightly chubby, vampire that roamed the nets at night and dozed off in the morning. So we kept in contact by email. He was happy at least. And that made me happy as well. 

"Did you get your applications done?" Connie asked in Korean, just for the sake of practice.

I nodded my head. With a grin, I held up my folder and shook it in her face. Connie laughed and pushed it away.

"Okay, okay, I get your point." She held up her brown file of applications as well. We had signed up to most of the same colleges. At least our top priorities were the same and so were most of our safeties. "Ready to do this?"

"Let's do it," I said in my fluent Korean. Did I mention that I had been learning for about a year now? With Connie's constant jabbering and nagging, I ended up speaking to her in Korean every time we met up. She shoved a stack of love novels into my hands once. I ended up learning Korean much more rapidly because they were all so captivating. Not to mention, tear jerking as well. "One…two…three." 

We shoved all our files into the mailbox and clasped our hands together, praying that good luck would be cast over them. 

"So…we have several months until our reply."

"Good thing college applications are the only type of mail that takes that long for a reply."

Connie sighed and linked her arm with mine. We walked down the streets to go to the nearest mall. It was time for an ice-cream celebration for finally finishing those applications.

"Good thing boyfriends don't think like colleges or else we'd be waiting forever."

I gave a silly laugh that made her stare at me. Waving my hand to dismiss her strange look, I pulled her into the ice-cream store. "My treat," I said. "Strawberry, coffee or tiramisu?"

Erasing the confounded stare off her face, she quickly went up to the ice cream and began the long journey of Connie's indecisive mind. 

"HANEUL! HANEUL!" Connie yelled, jumping up and down as she held a sheet of paper. I stared at it, letting my head following her bouncing movement. I was about to get dizzy when she stopped. "I got accepted into Stanford!"

Her college letter had come? I had the sudden urge to see mine. Stanford was one of the schools that Connie and I had both applied for. We both wanted to go there and it was one of our top choices. I grabbed her arm and shoved the books into my messenger bag. Then we began to race back to my house. It was a good thing it was only several blocks away from school.

Panting as I reached my apartment, I pulled out a set of keys and fumbled for the right one. Then I opened up the mailbox, only to have two envelopes spill out. The one that faced upwards was from Stanford. With trembling hands, I opened the envelope to pull out a letter. I felt myself frown as I read it. Connie noticed my expression and looked over my shoulder.

"WHAT?" she yelled. "How can they do that to you?"

I let the letter slip from my hands. It fell on the floor but I didn't care. I wanted to throw and tantrum and stomp all over the stupid thing. 

"Your grades and SAT score was better than mine. Why the heck would they put you on the waiting list?"

"I don't know," I muttered as I picked up the other envelope.

Connie gave me a comforting pat on my shoulder. "It's okay. Do you want to take a look at the other envelope?"

I shook my head, giving her a firm, tight smile.

"I think I just want to rest right now."

"Oh, I'll see you at school then." 

I waved her goodbye and she slowly walked back to her house. I knew she wanted to go to Stanford so I didn't want to be the one to hold her back. I walked into the house and thanked God it was empty. Then I threw the other envelope on the coffee table. I was about to fall asleep when several words on the brown envelope caught my eye.

It wasn't exactly the words that caught my eye. It was the language it was in. I opened the folder and pulled out a single sheet of paper. I began to read it quickly, my head spinning the whole time. I felt the strange chills go from my head to my torso.

_Congratulations.  
You have been accepted to Ajou University…_


	9. Chapter 9

**START8**

"You didn't tell me that you applied for uni in Korea!" Connie exclaimed. Her voice held excitement and disappointment at the same time. "And to Ajou University! Isn't that one of the top ten!" 

Her expressions changed so rapidly. It was an extremely different reaction from Chris. He just laughed and teased me for even trying to apply. Even as I read his email, I could hear his bursts of comedic laughter between the lines. It was a good thing that he wasn't physically there to tease me. I would never hear the end of his voice.

"I don't know…" I muttered. I had forgotten entirely that I had signed up for Ajou University. When the acceptance letter came, I was so surprised. Then I remembered Ajou wasn't the only university I applied to.

Just for luck, I tired to apply for KoRyu. That was one of the top three universities in Seoul. Of course, I expected the rejection that came but I was only testing the waters. The main reason I applied for university there was because I wanted to catch a glimpse of the youngest soccer player in the Korean team, Park JuYoung.

Oh the World Cup – don't get Connie started on that topic. She'll concentrate so happily on the match between Togo and France but once we hit Swiss, her anger was unstoppable. If words could really break bones, the ref would definitely not be living right now. His body parts wouldn't even be able to be buried. By the time Connie was finished with him, he would be just another speckle of dust in the wind.

"So," Connie nudged. "Are you going?"

"I think so," I replied.

It was the best option out of the other universities I had applied to. The ones I wanted to go to have placed me on a waiting list. The ones I had only slight interest in offered me a scholarship but their activities didn't suit me.

There is a truth to why I chose to go to Ajou University. I called Stanford to ask why I was placed on their waiting list. They put me on hold for the longest minute of my life before getting back to me. When they did, I exhaled so loudly they asked if I was okay. I said I was and begged them to continue on.

What I found out shocked me. They said I had much potential but I was better off in a Korean university. The truth was that I had many Korean words scribbled over my application. Some answers were written in Korean but scratched out and rewritten in English. I was so puzzled when they told me this because it was all unconsciously done. Not only that, but my personal statement focused on Korean culture. Stanford was extremely shocked when they called my school to discover that I was in fact, not from South Korea nor was I Korean at all. So they met up with my counselor who showed them the universities I had applied to. When they discovered that I was accepted to Ajou, they placed me on the waiting list.

So that's how it is.

Connie threw a magazine on the table. It was a local Korean magazine that her cousins sent her every month. I picked up the magazine and gazed at the picture. 

"Lee Junki," she said. She stuck a baby carrot into her mouth and chomped loudly on it. "He's such a girly looking guy." 

I smiled weakly and continued to look at the picture. I was about to throw it back on the coffee table when the sun reflected into my eyes. I peered at it when I noticed a sparkle over his ear. Connie continued to munch on the carrot sticks as I flipped through the magazine.

"You can keep it to practice your Korean." 

I didn't reply until I reached the article on Lee Junki. Yet the words just flew by me like any other article. They just talked about his latest work and how he was doing. I began to look at his photo shoot. Needless to say, his face was just as nice as I remembered. The bags under his eyes were less visible. In large letters, the magazine quoted him.

_"I miss sleep. So I try to sleep every moment I get." _

Letting out a small giggle, Connie turned to me, giving me a weird glance. I shook my head, saying it was nothing but I had actually remembered the first time I saw Junki sleeping. That day in the hospital, he was sleeping so peacefully, like an angel. I wanted to trace my fingers over his skin. Even without makeup, it was nice and smooth.

Then, there it was, like a single star in the dark sky, the cross earrings that hung from Junki's ears. I almost gasped when I saw them. The air barely escaped my lungs as I let my fingers dance over his glossed photo. I touched each photo that showed his earring. It felt surreal. Gulping, I rubbed his 2-D ear, hoping that it was just a dream. But when I lifted my finger, the earring remained.

Connie stared at me.

"Rubbing that magic won't make Junki pop out of nowhere you know."

She knew I liked Lee Junki a lot. 

Suddenly the phone rang, startling the both of us. Connie shrugged and indicated that she wasn't going to pick it up even though she was right next to it. I sighed and reached over to answer the phone. I tried to tickle Connie as I spoke. 

"Hello?"

"…Haneul?"

I almost dropped the phone. It's been a year since I heard that voice. My name sounded like a melody from his lips. It was almost as if he could bring the true meaning behind my name. Ironically, it's not even my real name.

"Yes?" I whispered and got off Connie. She stared at me as I shushed her. As I answered in Korean, she perked up. Now she was curious but I wouldn't allow her to pick up the other phone to listen. "I'm here."

"Is…he there?" 

I felt the phone slip from my hands. I was sweating so much. Nervously, I began to twirl my hair.

"You mean Dong Young? No."

I heard him breath a sigh of relief.

"Thank goodness. That boy scares me." I heard him laugh a little. That made me relax by a tiny notch. He seemed nervous too. "I just want to let you know that I'll be in town for a photo shoot."

"How did you get my number?"

I know I'm not answering his comment but that question was killing me. Actually, many questions were bursting to be answered inside of me. Like why he wasn't asking why my Korean was so fluent or why he decided to call me up now. Why he didn't try contacting me after Dong Young hung up on him…there were so many questions left unanswered.

"Um…" I could imagine his cute self-squirming in discomfort. "I asked Dong Young but he refused to tell me. The next time I called his place, his mother answered and gave me a friend's number. Then I called up that friend and he told me yours."

"But I changed my number since last year."

"I made those phone calls last week."

I remained silent, letting myself absorb this information. What a joke. Why would he bother to call me after an entire year? I wanted to hang up but there was a nagging voice inside that told me to make sure.

"Is this some cruel joke Dong Young is playing on me?" I spoke angrily through the phone. "Yah, Kim Dong Young, I never thought this was funny."

"Dong Young doesn't know I'm calling."

"Oh…"

I felt quite stupid for making a small scene like that. But I just had to make sure. This was too real to be true. No, it was too much of a fantasy to be true.

"I'll be in…tomorrow."

I think I fainted at that point. I'm not quite sure. But I heard Connie screaming my name and his voice screaming through the phone. I felt the waxy plastic slip out of my hands as my head hit the floor. Everything turned black but I could hear the distinct voice in my head. _I'll be in…tomorrow. I'll be in…tomorrow._ So it's been a year, Lee Junki.

Why do you still remember me?


	10. Chapter 10

START9 

I stood near the exit, without a sign to acknowledge my existence. To my surprise there were no other fans around. I thought someone would've gotten a hold of this type of information. Oh, if only Connie knew, she would freak. Though I didn't tell her that I 'knew' Lee Junki; she got an idea that I was meeting some ex-boyfriend from Korea. Boyfriend would be an overstatement.

Well, it's been half an hour and he still hasn't arrived. I called the airport services again and they reassured me that the flight I was waiting for was the only one from Seoul. That still didn't give me much hope. I hung up with a sceptical face. I never liked waiting. My feet were asking to move. Suddenly tapping, my left foot began its cry for movement. But I stood firm.

Ten more minutes later, my foot wasn't the only body part that was impatient. My hands were aching; my entire body was sick of waiting. Even the usual pacing wasn't enough for me. I checked my watch for the time. It was already four thirty. If I headed home, it would take me a good hour. Since my mother expected me home for dinner, what else could I do?

I sighed and turned around to leave. As my feet took me away, I heard a chorus of screams. Not only was it high pitched and fan girl like, it was echoed by a clutter of footsteps. I highly doubt those screams were because of me.

My curiosity and value for life made me turn around. I slowly turned my head, hoping that the mob wasn't heading my way. My feet stepped to a side as the hoard of people were moving towards my way. I stood on my toes to catch of glimpse of the celebrity. I saw a brown and pink Von Dutch hat peak over the hoard of fans. In a loose jacket and white shirt, stood a tall celebrity with sunglasses.

"WANG LEE HOM!" the gang of girls chorused.

I stared at the tall, American Born Taiwanese boy. His smile lit the room as he made his way to a more open space. Looking at all the fan girls, I realized that everyone I had seen, as normal people, were quiet fans in disguise. I tapped a girl on the shoulder and she told me that if they were standing there openly, the security guard would've kicked them out because Lee Hom's entrance wasn't supposed to be announced.

"Where is he coming from?"

She looked at me quizzically. "Korea, didn't you know?"

"Oh…" I faked a movement and pointed into the swarm of girls. "My friend dragged me here. Why is he coming from Korea?"

"He helped produce an album for Lim Jeong Hee."

Then she grabbed my arm to pull me deeper into the crowd. When Lee Hom made a movement, she let me go and I slipped away. Finally exiting the crowd, I brushed myself off and exhaled. A group like that wasn't pleasant to be apart of. At least…Junki's fan signing was orderly. I looked at my watch again and saw that it was already four forty-five. By the time I got on the bus, it would be six.

A hand touched my shoulder, causing me to jump and turn around.

With a heavy Asian accent, the voice said in English, "Miss, I believe that you're in the wrong place."

I almost screamed with joy as Junki's youthful face gazed down at me. Muffling my mouth with his hand, he brought me away from the crowd of girls were beginning to give us stares I pulled Junki's hat lower and leaned into its shadow. I wrapped my arms around his neck as the fans dismissed us as a lovesick couple.

We giggled as I took his hand to lead him away. Playing the full part, I allowed Junki to slip his hand across my back and around my waist. In his other hand, he dragged a suitcase. I pulled his hat lower as another girl eyed him. Our feet were begging to run so we could laugh and talk but the fear of groupies held us down.

Safely walking down the hallway, we exited the airport doors. The hot summer air greeted us as Lee Junki almost gagged on it. He slid off his hat and waved it in front of his face. I brought us to the bus stop where we waited for a bus.

"So – "

"LEE JUNKI!"

My mouth hung open with my question only for the wind to answer. A little group of girls, obviously not from the Lee Hom fan group, came running towards us. I heard them chattering in Korean and could only assume that they were locals from Korea. Junki gave me a sorry and timid smile.

As they ran over, they whipped out a set of paper and pencils. Junki stood there with the gracious smile of his and signed each of them. But he refused to take pictures. I heard him telling them it was because he didn't have enough sleep so he couldn't afford to let flash hit his eyes. I thanked the builders of this airport that the bus stop was in some place dark.

The girls sighed as Junki gave them a cheerful wave. Even I could tell he wanted to get away fast. Yet unexpectedly, more people came rushing forward.

"LEE JUNKI!" they all screamed.

My eyes widened as I caught more girls screaming and running towards us. I recognized some as Lee Hom's fans. As they ran, I finally saw the end of the group. At the very end, Lee Hom walked out and paused. He turned to us and saw Lee Junki receiving the fans. With a large grin, he yelled across the car lot.

"THANK YOU LEE JUNKI!"

With that, he disappeared into a taxi.

"Oh no," I said as I grabbed Junki's hand. "There's no way I'm going to stand this."

Junki looked at me with questioning eyes as I turned around. I wasn't speaking in Korean so he had no idea what I was saying. With my short legs, I began to run. I heard Junki's suitcase smash against the floor and make the loudest noise and Junki was dragged behind me. When I turned around, he was muttering apologies to his fans.

All of them stared in shock as I flagged down a taxi. I shoved Junki in before slipping in as well. The fan girls didn't bother chasing any further. They watched the taxi go by and I stared out the opposite window.

"What was that for?" Junki exclaimed. He sounded a little unnerved and angry.

"I don't like crowds."

"Or you just don't like people in general."

"Are you _trying _to pick a fight with me?"

Junki crossed his arms and looked the other way.

"Because I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask you to come back. And what photo shoot Lee Junki? Do you take me for an idiot? If it's a photo shoot where are your camera men?"

He bit his lower lip and didn't reply.

Suddenly the taxi driver spoke. "Um, not meaning to interrupt your lover's spat but where am I supposed to go?"

"Four Seasons Hotel," I said, trying my best not to snap at him. He gave me a grim smile and nodded his head. Then he took a left towards the highway. I turned to Junki with an expressionless face. I wanted to cross my arms as well but since he already did so, I didn't want to copy. "Why bother to call me an entire year later?"

"You're the one who changed your phone number!"

"And you think it's to avoid you? Don't give yourself so much credit Lee Junki."

The taxi made for an exit. I looked out at the city streets and knew that we were almost there. Junki unfolded his arms and I folded mine. He tried to get me to look at him but I refused. The frustration inside me, I guess it's a girl thing. I wanted him to apologize and say that he was wrong. I spoke against my own will. My voice came out in a tiny whisper as if it could shatter before it could reach his ears.

"Then why'd you tell everyone that I'm only a fan? Is that all I am?"

I saw the expression change on his face. He didn't expect me to hear him say that.

"When you're a celebrity, Lee Junki, you have to remember that everything you say will be available to public."

"Ah – Haneul yah," he called softly, reaching for my arm. I felt his fingers slide against my skin and I shivered. How did it all come to this? "I came down to see you, you know that right?"

I melted under his words. He spoke them with such tenderness that I didn't know whether or not it was a lie. Inside my own soul, I felt a rush of emotions. Everything I thought I had forgotten a year ago came back. When I looked at Junki's smooth face, I realized how easy it was to fall into a love trap. Especially when a celebrity sets it out. I started to wonder if I really liked Junki or if I just liked the public image of him.

He pulled my arms apart from each other. I felt his palm slid against mine and bit my lip. You can't possibly understand how much I was holding myself back. The pain thing that drove me away was fear. Fear that if I were caught on camera, Lee Junki would only say once more, "She's just a fan."

But he wasn't apologizing. Junki was trying to physically apologize by giving me a hug. And I didn't want to accept it.

I jerked my hand away as the taxi came in front of the hotel. A bellboy came by to open the door. Junki looked at me sadly as I turned to face the window. He shuffled around a bit and then handed the taxi driver some bills. Before he slid of the taxi, he gave the driver another bill. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him place a small box on the seat.

"Bye Haneul," he said and closed the door.

As the taxi began to move, I watched him through the window. My face pressed against the glass as he walked up the stairs. I could have slapped myself on the spot. As the taxi driver asked me where to go, I gave him my house address. I slid down in my seat, cursing myself. My hand hit against the box that Junki had placed down.

Trembling, I took it and opened the box. Right in the centre, were the pair of earrings I bought him. They dangled in the box as I noticed a line of words, hastily scribbled at the bottom.

_Every time I see these, I think of you. So how can I forget you? _

"Aw shit," I cursed. The taxi driver looked at me with arched eyebrows. I flung my arms wildly as I screamed. "Go back! Go back!"


End file.
